Full of Rage

October 14, 2018

I’m not a person who gets angry very easy, but recently I’ve been full of rage.

As a student Dietitian and a blogger, I’m getting really frustrated at the boundaries and blocks which are imposed on myself and others. This can be creativity wise, educational wise or even just my opinion. Yes, challenges are great but really? Sometimes I think we’re just very old fashioned and a little bit safe in our approaches.

One thing I’ve found REALLY annoying is that I am not allowed to share my opinion on my teaching quality. I’ve had SO many people come up to me going “well i don’t think that’s in your code of contact” or “you shouldn’t really be saying that about your lecturers before you’ve finished”. I totally get what you mean. But, let me make this clear, all my issues that I bring up in my blog, I have brought up via university feedback forms and with other lecturers (for example, my course leader). We also have a feedback group for our course where we share our thoughts, many again what I share on my blog. I feel it’s completely wrong as a person to withhold my opinions on the level of education I am receiving. I do not name names and of course, any serious issues of misconduct would not be addressed on here…. but isn’t my teaching experience making it more representative and relatable for other students? Can’t we help each other from this?? Aren’t I contributing to make a change??

Another thing that really frustrates me is that I have to keep my personality and my quirks from my profession. I TOTALLY understand professional vs personal boundaries and I know where they lie, but a lot of things? I feel are ridiculous. For example, as a student Dietitian, I understand that we can’t have hoops, jewellery below the elbow, nails, etc that represent my personality. But, (even though I don’t have either of these) we are refrained from having “funky” coloured hairs and tattoos, which must be covered. Surely in this day and age it’s completely wrong? It’s outdated! I’ve discussed this with people and they were like “omg, but I’d feel so much more comfortable if my doctor had a tattoo/purple hair/ an edgy style too”. A thing that I struggle with is adjectives. I tend to be bubbly, smiley and charismatic with people – I’ve spent YEARS building this up as a person to become more confident both in part time work and in social surroundings only for it to be knocked back out of me as a student. To an extent, I understand how word choice can be interpreted in the wrong way for a patient, but in many ways, I don’t want to be another churned out robot. I want to be relatable, friendly and mostly, myself as a professional. I feel this is SO much more relatable as a patient. And I’m not just saying that because I don’t want to stick to the rules. I’m saying this as a girl who’s spent years in and out of doctors surgeries and hospitals with various medical conditions, and someone who’s experienced first hand what makes a good professional. Someone you can chat to, relate to. Not a monochrome robot. I’m not like that and I don’t want to be.

And that’s where I come to the blogging world. Since becoming more involved and interacting within the blogosphere, I’ve discovered that there is a lot of goals, targets and standards you must meet. I mean, this does not apply to all by all means, but for some, this is definitely a competition. I feel the messages of “support” and “love” are just fake and another attempt and winning over attention. Again, I’m can’t know what goes on inside people’s heads, but a lot, and I mean A LOT seems bitter and fake. From bloggers I’ve known before, whilst some are absolute angels and genuinely such LOVELY people, but I know that some are very very very fake. And that makes me weary. What love you see from me will be true from my heart. I’m not afraid to question things, even if I’m wrong. It’s my opinion and I believe we should all challenge these. But yeah, bloggers just seem there to please other bloggers, with little regard to the real world and sense of social awareness, despite the social presence.

Okay so yeah. Three big long unsolicited rants. Of course, it’s not all doom and gloom and there’s a lot of positivity in all areas. It’s best to get them out and share, that’s what my blogs all about. Nutrition wise, I have to be a lot more careful about my rants (I have a lot!) because they impact on health, but never the less, I don’t think I should be frightened to share my opinion. And neither should you.

Remember, no one has made history quietly.

Emma x

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