The Comfort Zone. We all have one. For me, it isn’t a case of not pushing myself or striving for something more. I’m constantly striving to be better.. academically especially. I love researching and writing and learning new little irrelevant facts that may come in handy one day far far away at a pub quiz when I’m 45 years old. Who knows. But my comfort zone is a social concept. It’s being surrounded by those I’m close to and familiar with. Those I love. It’s blankets and cushions and sunlight through the window and warm cheese toasties with the echoing of soft familiar voices and birds in the distance. It’s the same playlist on loop with the lyrics and voices I know oh so well. It’s grasping my teddy bears paw, the familiar handhold he gives and has always given during even the darkest of days.
Outside my comfort zone: People. Being in public alone. Doing things alone.
My goals for this week are quite simple. But for me they’re big things. The concept and the process feels like I’m being swallowed up from inside – my heart racing and being so aware of every tiny little sound or movement. I’m trying to come into more of myself. This year is my selfish year. I want to make myself strong and whole again, confident and positive. I don’t want to be afraid and take every opportunity I gain. I want to gain knowledge and even more experience. I’m starting small but hopefully it’ll make me a better and stronger person.
These all seem so small and trivial. But these are little things I’ve avoided for months and months. I’ve been stuck in my homely little comfort zone and turning into my shell. I want to get out and feel good again.
My ultimate aim is to travel abroad for a few days by myself. I’m definitely not ready for that yet, but I’m building myself up slowly but surely. Hopefully one day soon I can do it.